This is Serious Stuff: A (Possibly Pretentious) Study in Magnetic Poetry

Ages upon ages ago, my mom and my brother went to Baltimore and while he got tickets to some stupid baseball game, I got EDGAR ALLAN POETRY.

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I actually have no problem with baseball, but this is cool, okay?

And finally, after a stressful move and a few train transfers , I finally have a fridge I’m proud of sticking ’em on!

So like any good nerd, I immediately sorted them into parts of speech. But some words could be a couple of different things and some were only sometimes used in that way and also I kinda forgot about prepositions for a full ten minutes.

It quickly became an amorphous blob of 19th-century-ness on the kitchen counter.

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My one rule for this is that I could only use every word (or word bit) the once. So things got less comprehensible as time went on.

First, up I did the sensible thing and tried to do as much of “Don’t Stop Believin” as I could which was one line.

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It’s a lot more sinister out of context, come to think…

I write one about Twinefold, where if it wasn’t full of fun-loving-slash-murderous faeries and pretty, pretty Deaglan, it’d be terrifying and depressing probably.

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This is another weird Faehunter one but spoilers. And I got the ‘Nevermore’ in there clutch.

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This one’s for the character of my new sci-fi project and has probably the last clever thing I’ve got with the mourning/morning play on words. Savor this, friends. It gets only worse from here. Also, got the “quoth” in there. Respect.

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cre·pus·cu·lar
/krəˈpəskyələr/
adjective
of, resembling, or relating to twilight.
I learned a new word today! Clearly this is a learning experience for us all and not something you’d find in the back of a highschooler’s notebook.

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This one is supposed to be about Hopper and the Tuann from In the House of Souls but also yeesh to the max, man.

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So they threw an “Amontillado” in there because it’s the Notorious E.A.P. so of course there is. So I “wrote” about death and partying and stuff? They loved that kinda thing in the Victorian times and there was a Disney movie about it so this poem must be deep and cool.

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I was running dangerously low on words here so I tried to make it rhythmic and cool and hoped no one would notice.

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Odin? I guess?

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Ooga ooga death comes for us all but love will save us.

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For best results, toss your word salad before serving then apply your meaning-dressing.

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And alas, the sad little orphans. Would you donate $100 a day to Save the Suffixes to change a life?

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(you now inexplicably hear sad piano music in the distance)